LOVE VS PAMPER

Is it true that one of the greatest needs is to feel loved? Seems so, but
it's not true!

'The need to be pampered', rather than 'the need to be loved', seems to be
the greatest craving. Is there a difference? When you want others to love
you (only) the way you want to be loved, it is pampering. To a lot of
people, being loved means their loved ones should always be soft on them,
always agree with what they say, never complain or criticize, never push
them beyond their comfort zones. basically leave them as they are, accept
them as they are and not show any signs of wanting to change them. But love
is not love that pampers. Love is love that makes a difference. Pampering
will weaken you. Love will create you.

After all, no man is perfect. There is endless scope to better ourselves.
Except those who love you, no one else cares about whether you improve or
not. In the name of tolerance, pampering will leave you with your
imperfections. Even at the cost of hurting your ego, love will give you
feedbacks to make a difference to you. Pampering works with your ego. Love
works on you

No man can always be right. In the name of acceptance, pampering will make
what's not okay look okay. Love will act as a mirror and reflect you to you
- not as you want to be seen, but as you truly are. The world will punish
you for your wrong; love will endure your wrong and work on making you
right. Only those who love you will tell you that there is gunk on your
nose; the rest will make a joke out of you. Pampering is a mere façade,
wanting to appear nice. One of the most honest ex-pressions of love is the
courage to take the risk of being mistaken and yet being a constructive
critic.

The motivation levels of most people are low. You need someone or something
outside of you to push you. Pampering will sinfully leave you in your
low performing, comfort zone. Love will even dare to risk the friendship to
create the friend. To demand - 'Give more of you to life', is an intense
ex-pression of love. You cannot be left as you are. That which does not
change does not grow and that which does not grow, dies. The call to awaken
one from his slumber is pure, classic love.

Pampering is like boozing. It gives you a joyful evening but nothing about
you may change. Love is like meditation. It may seem that nothing is
happening and yet everything about you will change. Crave to be loved and to
be created, and not to be pampered and get stagnated.

silence

Great truth that transcends Nature does not pass from one
being to another by way of human speech. Truth chooses silence to convey her meaning to loving souls.
-Kahlil Gibran
These words of wisdom apply to each one of us in the same way irrespective of our gender, social status, region or religion.

The moment when you wanted to convey your inner-most feelings to the love of your life, you search for words that would best describe your emotions. Your throat suddenly becomes dry and you are not in a position to utter a single
word! That is the time when silence holds your hands and leads you to your goal. All you have to do is to look into the eyes of your loved one with all your honesty..... they would know exactly how you feel! A moment of silence can manifest a thousand words!

All of you who"ve had some unforgettable sweet memories, try to recollect the most magical moments of your life.....I"m sure they are the times when you spoke nothing and your eyes and your ex-pressions did all the talking (Of course exceptions are always there :-)).

So, as the popular song of Ronan Keating goes....

"You say it best when you say nothing at all"

Dont turn love into relationship

Love comes like a strong breeze and carries away two lovers to unknown dimensions. Lovers go through an experience peak and then need to settle down. In the process, they start feeling bored, craving the same peak yet again and again. When they don"t reach it, they feel frustrated and fall into the ditch of misery.

Peaks in love are experienced when lovers open their wings to fly high into the sky together. There"s a whole sky of freedom and togetherness that they feel in each other"s company. But the moment they start clinging to each other and suppress freedom, love falls into an abysmal valley of misery. Then they wonder what happened to their love! The clinging starts clipping their wings, killing their love.

True love is unconditional, and based on an individual"s freedom. Two persons can be very loving together. The more loving they are, the lower the possibility of any relationship. The more loving they are, the greater the freedom between them. The more loving they are, the thinner the prospect of any demand, domination, expectation. Naturally then, there is no question of frustration.

Remember this: Don"t have any expectations. Love because love is your own inner growth. When you love, you call your spring of growth closer. Your love will help you grow towards more light, more truth, more freedom. Love but don"t ever create a relationship!

A relationship is a part of the business world. A slight change in the situation, and it evaporates. It has no solidity. If love comes spontaneously, suddenly, like a fountain, asking for nothing in return, then it is one of the greatest treasures. Love is a fire. The purer it is, the better it burns all riddles, all problems. But love as a relationship creates problems, riddled with all sorts of undesirable things.

Remember this: Love is capable of destroying everything else, just don"t let it become a relationship. If you do, love will disappear and in its place will come politics and manipulation. Then, your problems will only increase.

Osho says: "I am against all kinds of relationships. For example, I don"t like the word "friendship" but I love the word "friendliness". Friendliness is a quality within you; friendship becomes a burdensome relationship."

Osho elaborates: "Friendship is a relationship. You can be in that relationship with a few people. Friendliness is a quality, not a relationship. It has nothing to do with anybody else. It is basically your inner quality. You can be friendly with many, many people. You can be friendly even when you are alone. You cannot be in friendship when you are alone-the other is needed-but friendliness is a kind of fragrance. A flower blooms; nobody passes by, yet it is fragrant. It matters not whether anyone comes to know of it; being fragrant is its quality."